


Scars

by thesometimeswarrior



Series: Hold the Fort: Pictures of Hogwarts During the Year of the Carrows [13]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Book 7: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Hurt/Comfort, Infertility, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-15
Updated: 2016-05-15
Packaged: 2018-06-08 16:35:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6863596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesometimeswarrior/pseuds/thesometimeswarrior
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“How much longer are they going to keep stealing things from us? They stole a whole year from us, they stole our <i>school</i>, and our safety, and our grades, and our very <i>childhoods</i>, and they stole years of sleep from us afterward. And now…<i>this.</i>”</p><p>Not all scars can be seen. Hannah and Neville are devastated to learn that the Carrows took more from them than they knew.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Scars

“I _hate_ them, Neville,” she growls, refusing to meet her husband’s eyes. “Still, after all these years.”

“I know,” he says. “I do too.” He reaches to lay a comforting hand on her back, but Hannah leans away. Neville understands, and he doesn’t push—he never has. He, too, has moments, when he thinks of _that_ year—Merlin, has it been fifteen years _already_?—and can’t bear to be touched. 

“I’m glad for their sake that they’re locked up. Because I could kill them.”

Neville nods. “I’ll go get some Firewhiskey.”

He returns from the ground floor with a bottle and two glasses. He pours for each of them, and they down them quickly. “At this rate,” Neville says. “We’ll have to restock the entire pub.”

Hannah doesn’t laugh, and Neville doesn’t expect her to, not really. She pours herself another glass, sips it before continuing: “How much longer are they going to keep stealing things from us? They stole a whole year from us, they stole our _school_ , and our safety, and our grades, and our very _childhoods_ , and they stole years of sleep from us afterward. And now… _this_.”

There’s no response he can give. He is devastated, too, of course, but not as much as she is, and he will not let her know just how much his heart aches. He thinks, secretly, that he is a better teacher than he would ever be a father (How could he be a good father, when he never had a father in his own life?), but that doesn’t mean that he didn’t want to try, didn’t want to raise a child in this world that was so much better than the one in which he was raised.

“All I ever wanted, my whole life, Neville, was to be a mother.”

“I know.” They’ve discussed this, many times now. “I’m so sorry, Hann.”

She sighs a shaky little sigh. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t complain. The Carrows…their curses might have made me…so that I can’t…they may have done _this_ to me…but you…I mean I lost count how many times they Cruciatused you that year, and then You-Know-Who set you on—”

“Hannah,” he interrupts her. “We all suffered. That year was Hell. For all of us. And it’s not a competition. So please, listen to me. It’s okay to be upset about this.”

She finishes the glass of Firewhiskey in her hand, and sniffs a few times. “Do…do you think that they knew…the Carrows…do you think they knew what they were doing…I mean I don’t even know _which_ curse did this to me…there were so many, but…Do you think they knew?”

Neville thinks for a moment. “I doubt it,” he says finally. “I mean, I don’t think they’d have cared either way, but I think the Carrows were just itching to use whatever Dark curses they knew on all of us. I don’t think they cared or even thought about what they did, short of killing us. They probably didn’t _know_ what half of ‘em did. And that this was an effect of one of ‘em…well, I don’t they knew.” He sighs. “This never would have happened if you didn’t join the DA. You’re gonna get angry at me for saying this, but I’m sorr-”

“No way, Neville. You sound like Harry. I didn’t join the resistance because of you. It was _my_ choice. Don’t you dare think for a second that it was yours, or that I did it for you. Because I didn’t. ” Hannah pauses. “And you know what? Even if I knew that _this_ would happen, I’d do it again. Because what we did that year, the kids we helped protect, and the kids we gave hope to? It was worth it. It was even worth... _this_.”

She lets him embrace her now, and when he does, he kisses her head. “You astonish me with your strength, Hannah Longbottom.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

They are silent for a moment in each other’s arms, until finally she sighs. “What do we do now? We only bought the pub from Tom so that we could have extra income for when we had kids…”

“Well,” says Neville, smiling slightly despite himself. “I wasn’t going to bring this up. But McGonagall wants me to be Head of Gryffindor House—” 

“ _What?_ Since _when?_ That’s amazing, Neville! Why wouldn’t you tell me?”

“Because it means that I’d have to live in the Castle instead of Apparating to Hogsmeade every morning. And I didn’t know if you would want to move. But, if we were to sell the Leakey Caldron…”

“Yes! Neville, let’s do it. You have got to take this job!”

“And it wouldn’t be the same, and I’m not for one second saying it would, Hann, but in a way, we would be like parents to all of the students in the House.”

She becomes quiet, and Neville regrets the words. He opens his mouth to apologize, to admit that he shouldn’t have said that, that it was uncalled for, but before he can, Hannah responds quietly: “Yeah. Yeah we would.”

He exhales in relief, and then reaches for his wife's hand before quietly continuing: “And I think Rosmerta said something about wanting to sell the Three Broomsticks. We could buy it, you could manage it, and we could hire a night attendant…”

“Actually,” says Hannah softly. “Didn’t you mention that Pomfrey was thinking of retiring soon? I—I want to get certified as a Healer, Nev. And see if McGonagall will hire me as Hogwarts Matron.” She pauses, breathes for a minute. “I’m going to take care of children. It’s what I was made to do. And if…if I can’t have my own, then I’ll do a damn good job taking care of other people’s.”

Neville hugs her to him and nods, tears glistening in his eyes. “Yeah, you will, Hannah. You absolutely will.”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed!


End file.
